an aussie in austria

Even with a generous allotment of maternity leave in Austria (for me it amounted to 2 years, 2 months), it did eventually come to an end.

I was looking forward to going back to work. Craving it, even. Something new to look forward to; getting out of the house (wearing more than stained tracksuit pants); drinking a cup of hot tea in peace while I read through emails; talking to my colleagues about more than just nap lengths and tantrums.

In some ways it was as easy and enjoyable as I imagined. In others it was harder.

Two years on… things at work are a bit… same same but different. I couldn’t just slot back into my previous role. Someone else is on that. So, I’m learning new stuff, though some of it is the same.  Some of it is annoyingly the same. Several things never actually got resolved and are still on my to-do-list from two years ago. It’s kind of like visiting home. Everything feels the same, but everyone has moved on. I was surprised it took me a few weeks to get back into the rhythm. Though it was a kind of nice honeymoon phase. Because then reality hit – and even though I’m only working 20 hours – it’s like 20 hours on speed. It’s true what they say, going back part-time often means trying to fit a full time job into part time hours and not getting paid for it. Then there’s the fact that I’ve basically had a runny nose since the beginning. With a child in daycare and Autumn hitting, it’s just the way it is. And managing work and a sick child is not fun.

Even on a good day it’s not easy to get a toddler out the door. There have been plenty of tantrums (his and mine), though we’re definitely starting to get into a groove. On the days I’m working from home it feels like I’m doing two jobs at once, only one of them is partly on-call. Though I am lucky that I can work from home most of the time, and on the one day I drive to the office, hubby does the drop off and pick up. That leaves me free to leave the house early, drive through the darkness listening to tunes, enjoy coffee breaks and lunch. It leaves me free to be a dad, essentially. For one day I am not a mother – I am a working woman – I just don’t want to leave too late cause I do want to kiss my boy good night.

I do miss my long, quiet days with Sammy; the mornings languishing over breakfast because we didn’t have any appointments; the days I stayed in pyjamas because… hell it’s raining and there was no need to leave the house. But I really do enjoy the afternoons I spend with Sammy now when I’ve been working half the day and he’s a happy ball of excitement from daycare. I have more tolerance. I feel more mentally stable.

It’s good for me. Like I knew it would be. But I’m happy and privileged to have been able to spend the first two years of Sammy’s life with him. I’m lucky to be able to return to the job I know (and mostly love) and still have enough time for my child.

But anyway, I gotta run. I gotta plan my wardrobe for tomorrow, make my sandwich, and pack some tea bags (because two years went by and Austrian black tea only seemed to get worse). Have a good day at work out there! I know I will.