I feel like it’s been a long road back to normal for me. It was only recently that I went to the supermarket without a mask. Most people waved goodbye to Covid ages ago, but having a young baby (and also never having had Covid) meant staying vigilant. It was my choice, of course. But having a child just as the rest of the world was emerging from Covid meant essentially extending the lockdown.
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In my pre-birth course, I posed what I thought was a simple question about how to set up baby for sleeping at night, and instead received the disturbing news that… he should sleep with me. In the bed!
Are you mad?
Well, they said, you’re not going to get out of bed to feed him every two hours, are you?
Actually, that’s exactly what I was planning on doing!
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I like my life in Austria. I have lots of support. I am happy here. Yet in the months since I had a baby, I have never felt so homesick and alone in my entire life. I have never before questioned my decision so much. The question to move to Austria, you ask, or the question to have a baby? Well… both.
This whole process of having a baby and becoming a mother is an adjustment. It’s much harder when you’re in a different language, a different culture and family is far away. I’m lucky to have great in-laws who are very supportive and respectful. But it doesn’t change the fact that they’re not my parents. My parents haven’t met Sam. They won’t until he’s almost a year old. They’ll have a harder time cultivating a relationship with him. And all the Skype time can’t change that. I’m lucky that hubby is great at taking photos, but sometimes seeing all the pictures of his parents with Sam just makes me sad because it all hits me again.
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Following on from the post of my top 10 favourite baby products from 0-3 months, now that we’ve hit that elusive 6 month mark, here’s the next instalment.
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Going into this I felt pretty strongly about protecting my kid against things like excessive screen time, obsession with phones, watching television etc. Well, at least the holier than thou part of me wanted to be. Having TV on in the background was ok, I surmised, since that’s the way I grew up, but I don’t want someone showing Sam their screen… because that’s crossing a line… isn’t it? Or maybe it’s just a sign of the changing times.
Because I was conscious of it. I actively tried to limit my phone use when he was ‘aware’. If he was awake we didn’t watch TV, we kept him company. We played with him.
But here’s the thing. A phone is not just something you use to call and text anymore. And even though I actively try not to just grab my phone for no reason, I still pick it up a hell of a lot. In the old days you’d wait for the hourly weather on the radio… now I check the weather app to find out what we need to wear for our walk. If I want to play music, bam, I pick up my phone and open another app. And if I suddenly remember something, I don’t pull out a piece of paper like I used to, I add it to the lists in my phone.
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Before Christmas, someone asked me if I was excited… and I had to admit… I wasn’t really. I mean, it’s not like I was big into Christmas before we had a child – with a relatively small family it’s really just another day… with presents. But with Sam too young to understand the concept, combined with my stay at home role, it just didn’t hold a lot of focus.
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Look, winter isn’t all bad, but I’m a summer girl at heart. And growing up in Australia, I got used to the hot summers. Sure, Melbourne winters do get cold, especially on a freezing day, with Arctic winds spiralling in, but it’s short-lived, even if it doesn’t feel like it at the time. So the move to Austrian winter was a shock, and though I’ve somewhat gotten used to it, I’m not going to grow to like it.
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The first weeks with a newborn are brutal – exactly like they say. Brutal in ways not even thought possible. It’s just everything rolled up together – emotion, hormones, recovery from birth, sleep deprivation, breastfeeding, learning to keep a small creature alive, him learning how to be alive, and just coming to terms with the fact that you’re now stuck with this guy forever.
When Sam was between 2-3 months, it got a little easier. There was a noticeable shift. And again it was a combination of a lot of stuff; both of us were better and faster at feeding, so despite the 2 hour nightly wakings, there was more time between to sleep; we were both learning how to survive so could just cope better; he was still sleeping a lot during the day, so I had more time and flexibility to myself.
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I did a lot of research before Sam was born on what babies needed. In particular I researched what was not necessary. You always hear about how half the stuff recommended is just marketing and I figured a minimalist approach would be the way to go. But of course, some of these things that you don’t really need can be gold… and the key to saving your sanity. So read on for my top 10 products that I’ve used in the first 3 months.
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Going into pregnancy I already knew about the (allegedly) hellish fourth trimester and had made the decision that for the first three months after birth I would be making no fixed plans and having no expectations on myself or my child. So when my parents cancelled their September trip due to Covid I was half glad. Sure, it would have been great to see them and for them to meet the baby, but I wasn’t sure I wanted guests in the house in the first three months, even my parents!
No one was more surprised than me, when, five weeks after birth, I resumed my almost daily swimming regime at the pool. It was an important step for me, mentally, and physically, and although I wasn’t pushing myself to go every day, it just happened that I could, so I did.
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an aussie in austria 