an aussie in austria

Now that we’re all starting to think about travel again, and since aeroplane food isn’t something I’m going to be able to partake in for a while, I thought I’d share with you my tips for making the most out it on your next flight. If you’re a lover of aeroplane food like me, you might appreciate these!*

Wake me for food

Some airlines have a sticker you can attach to your seat that reads: Wake me for food. This ensures that even if you’re asleep, you will never miss a meal. It doesn’t help with the hot towels though – I have woken up smelling the sweet smell of hot towels and chased the flight attendant down the plane for one – damn I love those hot towels… but not as much as aeroplane food.

Running out of mains

In economy, the choice of two mains isn’t always available. And there doesn’t seem to be a tried and tested rule about where they’ll start and stop the food service to ensure you’re at the beginning. Sometimes they have two carts going, and will start one part-way up the aisle, so just because you’re at the back, it doesn’t mean you’ll miss out. And occasionally, being last is a blessing, because even though they ran out of lamb half way up, when they go to restock, they’ll pull extra lamb from other carts and viola – lamb is once again available.

If they do run out of your preferred choice, you can opt to wait till the end to see if any are left. But if there aren’t, take it in good grace. You’re on an aeroplane, not a 5-star restaurant.

Hungry? Ask for more

If by chance you are not satisfied with the feeding every three hours that happens on long-haul flights, you can always ask for more. Wait until the food service is over and head to the back of the plane to see if there’s an extra meal available. Or just pick up a piece of fruit, a bowl of noodles or a chocolate bar. See, you certainly won’t starve.

Stay hydrated

On a long haul flight it’s so important to stay hydrated. I always ask for two drinks. Be it wine or juice that takes your fancy, an additional glass of water is always a good idea. The best idea, of course, is to take an empty drink bottle and ask the flight attendants to fill it up. It saves time in the long run and you never have to worry about getting thirsty.

Two wines

If you are drinking wine, and they’re serving it in small bottles, don’t be shy to ask for two at once, especially if it’s red. They store all the drinks in the fridge, and the red wine is always ice cold. By the time your first bottle is gone, not only will you not have to go and ask for another one, the second one will be perfect red wine temperature. Thank me later.

Don’t be drunk

But for Gods sakes, don’t be a stupid drunk on a plane. Have a few drinks, get happy, then go to sleep. You don’t want to be the reason your plane turns back.

Pee offpeak

Staying hydrated in the air means drinking lots of water. If you’re like me and you also like to drink wine, then that equates to drinking lots more water. In this case, the aisle seat is your friend. Don’t hold that pee in – don’t make a challenge of seeing how long you can go without peeing – it’s just not good for you. Go to the toilet whenever you need to, and whenever is practical. There’s no queue in the dead of the night, but as soon as they turn those lights on, the jam is halfway up the aisle. And during the food service don’t bother, you’ll get stuck behind the cart either on your way there or on your way back. Seriously, pee when you need to – and even sometimes when you don’t – I there’s always a chance the seatbelt sign comes on and then you’re stuck in your seat in pain, only to have to wait behind a dozen other people as soon as they turn it off!

*Note: these tips apply to long haul economy. If you’re in the pointy end of the plane, well you enjoy that prime beef and champers and have a nice long sleep.