Pregnancy

Dad’s Diet

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jeans

If you read my last post, you’ll know that even 18 months post-partum, I was still holding onto that annoying baby weight. So, before I threw in the towel and bought a brand new wardrobe, I figured I’d give my body a chance… a chance to remember the weight it had always been, and slim down if that’s what it wanted.

But I didn’t want to do something too restrictive, because I enjoy Aperol and chips. That’s when I remembered my Dad telling me about an eating plan he tried. Which is why I call this Dad’s Diet. It’s kind of the 5:2 diet, but with flair from my Dad. And the great thing is, it’s simple.

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I’m losing it… or am I?

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Safety Beach, Australia

I’ve always been a fit, reasonably healthy person. And I’ve got good genes and habits to thank for a lot of it. I’ve never really needed to diet apart from the few times I’ve undertaken the Keto diet. So going into pregnancy it never really occurred to me that it would be difficult to shift kilos after it all ended. And despite the fact that I’m an older mum, it didn’t stop everybody from saying that of course I would bounce right back.

Women who have had babies know better. They know that carrying and birthing a child can mean changes to your body that never return to the way they were. Your rib cage and hips, for example, increase and often just stay that way (because… like… it’s pretty hard to move bones). In fact, your feet can go up a size, so it just shows what an impact pregnancy has on the body.

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The Austrian maternity leave system – giving me a break

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baby shoes

I was told when I moved to Austria that if I planned to have children I should definitely do it here because the system is so generous. And yeah… it was hard going through pregnancy and postpartum in a foreign country… but the advice was right… the maternity leave is generous. The system is good to parents.

Starting with eight weeks of paid leave before you even go on official maternity leave, it’s pretty standard to take two years off as a stay at home parent. During this time your workplace cannot fire you. And they must take you back in a part time role.

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A baby away from home

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baby feet

I like my life in Austria. I have lots of support. I am happy here. Yet in the months since I had a baby, I have never felt so homesick and alone in my entire life. I have never before questioned my decision so much. The question to move to Austria, you ask, or the question to have a baby? Well… both.

This whole process of having a baby and becoming a mother is an adjustment. It’s much harder when you’re in a different language, a different culture and family is far away. I’m lucky to have great in-laws who are very supportive and respectful. But it doesn’t change the fact that they’re not my parents. My parents haven’t met Sam. They won’t until he’s almost a year old. They’ll have a harder time cultivating a relationship with him. And all the Skype time can’t change that. I’m lucky that hubby is great at taking photos, but sometimes seeing all the pictures of his parents with Sam just makes me sad because it all hits me again.

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What’s the rush on the nursery?

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In preparing for the arrival of baby Sam, I made a list, as I tend to do. I marked what could be done before the birth, and what could be done after. I marked what needed research, and where I could purchase everything. The list was thorough, a culmination of googling baby necessities and talking to friends.

The nursery was a thing, so I designated a room – or rather – the room designated itself – the only one without a bed in it that didn’t sometimes get used as a guest room. I wasn’t one of those people keen to paint it or buy a whole lot of new, purpose-built furniture. We had an old desk, which could double as a change table. The chest of drawers could be cleaned out to house baby clothes. And the wardrobe could just stay there because… well how much stuff do babies really need anyway?

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It may not be fair… but it is what it is

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hospital pregnant

The decision to have a child is not a simple one for everyone. And as you may already know, I could come up with many more reasons not to have children, than to have them. And one of the big ones, for me, was simply the unfairness of being the woman. Because in the story of procreation, a man can be the most supportive being on the planet, but he still can’t do what a woman can.

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Fed is best

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I want to give a shout out to all those ladies out there who breastfed their children, including myself since I’m currently in the midst of it. I also want to give a shout out to all those who tried, only to find, that for whatever reason, it did not work out. And while I’m here, I also want to give a shout out to anyone who decided to bottle feed their babe, because after all, fed is best, and in many ways it feels like that would be the smart route.

I thought breastfeeding was an all or nothing thing. I knew it wasn’t easy, and did not work for everyone, and I held myself to no expectations. If it works, I said, I’ll do it, and if not, whatever. I thought there would be a black and white reason why it would work, or not, but what I’ve dug up is a whole lot of shades of grey.

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Huh? What does einleiten mean?

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They say you forget the pain of childbirth. Ha! Who are they kidding? Sure, time passes, and like everything that passes, it feels less traumatic. But I’m not going to forget the pain of childbirth any more than I forget the chronic back pain I had to navigate through to get to that point.

But I can reflect back on the experience and choose to put away the worst parts. That I don’t think I can do this feeling, knowing it was all on me. And the expressions on the doctor and nurses faces toward the end when I could well see they were concerned but didn’t want to show how much. I can remember how from all this experience, I got something out of it (apart from a healthy child) – I learnt a new German word.

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I think I’m the only one still wearing a mask…

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Eating outside during Covid

Covid? What’s Covid? Oh that awful thing that plagued us for two years and is now… gone? Except it’s not gone… and though we’ve enjoyed a deliciously warm early start to summer here in Austria, it’s not even really trying to hide. Luckily, it has wound itself down so it’s not causing the kind of mayhem it did previously. But it’s still causing plenty of disruptions.

I know that if it hits me everything will be fine. But still, being pregnant I’m being extra careful.  Because the numbers, despite the good weather, are a lot higher than they were this time last year. And I just need to get through two or so more weeks. So yeah, I’m still wearing my mask. I’m still social distancing.

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